Momheart

Quite frankly, I could care less about football, so here I am folding laundry, watching my little guy sleep. This has been a week! Really in all aspects, but my role as Mom has especially been tested. We haven’t eaten as healthy as I’d have liked this week, which makes me cringe because I know the affects of not eating well. So, when bad sleep and emotional meltdowns happen, I can’t help but kick myself. But I’m gonna lay my momma heart open for you, what makes it worst is when I get irritated or lose my temper because of said meltdowns and lack of sleep. The guilt that follows is enough to make me want to do, no be, better.

Mom guilt has to be the worst form of guilt. I can’t help but think about things I’ve read, talking about how our children see and use how we respond and act to things, as a guideline for how they respond and act. You can’t help but ask the question, am I doing enough? Am I making the right choices for my child? Am I being a good example? It’s hard not to question every stage of Motherhood. But what I have learned is to lean into God and ask for guidance, patience, and reassurance in the things I do for my little bear (and really all things in life.) I don’t care how together the mom down the street seems-everyone has questions of what’s best for their child. At the end of the day what our kiddos really want, is us. I try to remember that after the 10th time he’s said, “Mama! Sit sit! Play!” Haha! But honestly, it’s time, Mama, to sit, and just play. In another 10 years he might not ask. I can physically feel my heart ache just thinking about it.

I guess my point is, keep doing the best you can do, whatever works for you and your family, lean into God, and don’t ever be too busy to sit and play.

Motherhood

One thing I know for sure is Motherhood looks differently for every mother. But I also know that motherhood is the same for every mother, in the sense of, we’re all doing what we feel is best for our little ones.

For some it’s a rough road, for some it’s been as easy as pie, and for some it seems best a road untraveled. Whether God blessed you with your own, or He led you down the road to bring your baby home, we’re all mothers loving our blessings to the best of our abilities!

My entire life I’ve felt like my “big questionin life has been, “What is my purpose?” While I believe some people have such a vividly clear vision of their purpose, I believe some it comes later in life in several snapshots of time. For so long I thought my purpose was something in music, but no matter what I did or tried, I never could get a life in music to work for me. I finally realized music was only a blessing to me, not necessarily a purpose.

Motherhood took me by surprise when it felt so right. If you’ve been with me for awhile, you’ve probably read my post about how I never thought I’d want to be a part of motherhood, if you haven’t, you can find it here. So you can imagine what a pleasant surprise and blessing it has been to truly let God mold me into who He wants me to be and to fully give him the reigns. I definitely still struggle with trying to “take control” but it’s when I let go that He showed me my true purpose. Motherhood.

I wouldn’t change a single thing. Some days it’s so incredibly hard and you think you can only bend and bend until you just can’t anymore. At the end of those days, I just try to tell myself, tomorrow is a new day and I have a new chance to be better and do better. I try not to ever let those days spill into my next day. Then some days are so wonderful and fun and so incredibly rewarding. Seeing the world through new eyes as I watch my little bear learn and see new things. To hear his laugh and watch his eyes in little boy wonder. So many little joys fill their days, I can’t help but feel those joys too.

So just remember mama, we’re all in this together and we’re all “figuring it out.” So when you see another mama, give her an encouraging word, or look, or nod. A simple gesture could mean so much to that mama who’s been up since 5, with a baby clinging to her side, trying to get the mountain of dishes done, the load after load of laundry put away, and get food on the table. She may just need to feel understood and seen. Never underestimate your power as an emotional human being.

I never thought I’d be the person to spend so much time wrapped up in one title, but Motherhood is both a mystery and a place that feels like home. Thank God for mothers.

*ASpottedHeart